I’m writing this not caring if anyone will read it or not. It helps me to focus my thoughts. I’m using Medium as my rubber duck.
I have hobbies
I’m a developer but I like doing some other things aside. For example, I like video editing and recording for TikTok. It relaxes me and drives my creative side, also drives me away from work and laptop. I used to do that, it was fun but led to nothing. Literally nothing, I gained nothing from it except from video editing skill which I forgot how to use since I haven’t used it for a while.
Personally, I always look for some benefit, usually financial. If I edit videos and record for TikTok I go in the direction of getting followers which I can monetize somehow, in any way like selling merch. Not right away, but in the future. It’s mixing pleasure with business. This is where problem begins.
I cannot afford to have hobbies
I’m 31 right now and the clock is ticking, at least in my head. I bought an apartment for my mother so now I have to pay off a mortgage. I still need to buy an apartment for myself since I live in another city. Just to put it in context, me and my mom have been subtenants for 17 years and it was time to stop that. We spent too much money on rent.
I need to cover everyday expenses, car expenses, save some money aside for rainy days, save money for old days etc. In my head, it’s a constant battle to keep earning money since I’m coming from a very poor family without a father.
I have a good job, that keeps my head above the water. If I really wanted, I could focus only on my hobbies, but then it would prolong everything else and I’m not getting younger by the day. That is why I can’t afford to have hobbies if I want to accomplish some basic life needs like getting my own apartment, paying off a mortgage etc. Hobbies might or might not earn money, so I have to focus on something more realistic.
What I want to say is that right now, at this point in my life, I need to focus on something that will earn me money directly, whether it is freelance or some side project.
Is there enough time in a day
I usually work 7–8 hours a day between 8 am and 4 pm, then relax and eat. It’s already 5 pm. I have no kids, but I have a partner. I’m left with max 3 hours of “free” time for myself, until around 8 pm. I can’t do a lot in 3 hours, I can’t focus well on a hobby and money-making side project, so I have to choose one of that. I need to spend time with my partner and relax after 8 pm so I’m time limited.
Of course, there is a weekend, but after working so much during weekdays, the weekend is a great time to relax and reset myself for the next week.
To sum up
To sum up, I will definitely focus on a money-making side project for now, until I earn some money to cover the bigger costs that I mentioned.
I can always record a TikTok video here and there, it won’t be high quality or anything, but it will be 10 minutes of fun per day.